Not sure...

I don't get why bad things happen to good people. I don't get why bad people happen to good people. 
I am a good person. I never do anything with ill-intent. I respect others. I get to know a person by observing, so I know what makes them tick so I can respect who they are. I feel their pains and happiness, even if I am only an acquaintance. I wish well for everyone, no matter their plight or struggles. I care.
I make mistakes. I say the wrong thing. I speak too much. I struggle to connect and share too much. I am not a perfect human being. The mistakes I make are never done with malice or contempt or hate. They are just because I am flawed, as we all are.

I am struggling to understand how to get out of a bad situation. It is one I got in because I didn't follow my gut, which to do date has been 100% accurate on my first gut reaction of people. I just don't listen all the time. And now, here I am, not knowing how to handle it when someone is trying to pull me down.

I know who I am. I know that nothing they say or do will ever define me or the person I am or will ever make me question myself. I know that people that know me know I am this person I described here. Yet, that doesn't change the situation I am in. That can't stop a toxic person from scraping their way back in to make an attempt to pull me down. And I don't know how to stop that. It makes me feel powerless in a situation where I should feel powerful. 

I will read quotes and research and try to get my head on straight. Good people shouldn't have to battle the toxicity of others. But that is the real world, and in the real world there are people that can't see beyond the swamp they are making. I just need to figure out my place to fight. 

Comments

Anonymous said…
You summed it all up in the first sentence. You are a good person and we all know that. Just hold your head up high and move on with your life. It will all come out okay. Love you!MOM
8/06/2017 6:11 AM
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