Nerves

I don't tell many people that my nerve pain has been back, most days, all day. I don't want anyone to think my surgery wasn't worth it, wasn't a success. I know it was. I trust fully in my doctor, the only doctor I have ever trusted. I rarely have cramps and contraction like pains. My back pain is different back pain now. I believe that he cut out all of the disease in surgery. I still get some adhesion pain, but that's to be expected because I probably have even more scar tissue now. 

But as my physical therapist said, nerve pain is often the result in this disease. And nerve pain isn't something that goes away. With the help of medication and physical therapy, I can make it better, but I can't make it go away. It's a hard decision to make. I don't want to be on drugs forever and I can't afford to go to physical therapy all the time and health insurance only covers so much of it. I am at a crossroads, trying to figure out how to do this. Trying to figure out how to cope. Somedays I function at about a 3 on the pain scale, those are good days. Lately, the bad days have been more frequent, about a 6 or 7 on the pain scale at least a couple days a week. I hate nerve pain. Have you ever had nerve pain? It's like a pinched nerve in your neck. But it's in my hips and legs. And it's kind of all over. Why? Nerve pain radiates, it spreads. Light touch on my legs, on a bad pain day, feels pretty terrible too. My nervous system is totally out of whack. And because of pain, it causes me to sometimes limp and to readjust for pain, which makes my alignment off. That causes knee and hip pain. 

Sigh. I didn't intend for my blog to be used to whine all the time, I swear. It just seems like I am talking to someone about it without actually talking to someone about it. 

Anyway, time to get up and get ready for work.