Artemis

“So-called ‘global warming’ is just a secret ploy by wacko tree-huggers to make America energy independent, clean our air and water, improve the fuel efficiency of our vehicles, kick-start 21st-century industries, and make our cities safer and more livable. Don’t let them get away with it!” --Chip Giller, founder of Grist.org, where environmentally minded people gather online.

My mother is less than enthused that it has been almost 2 months with no new entries. That can somewhat be blamed on my boyfriend, whom I have been dating for almost 2 months. Not his fault at all, but I am sure you can see the time correlation. So here is a post, during my birth week. That is how my sister likes to celebrate her birthdays, so I shall do the same. Dinner on Wednesday with my other sister , her boyfriend, a friend and my boyfriend. Lunch on Thursday with co-workers. Flying to Helena on Thursday to visit my sister and brother-in-law. And then celebrating my birthday with a play and dinner over the weekend, before heading back home on Sunday. Should be a great birth week. Too bad it started with a crabby day Monday. It can only get better when the week ends with my birthday on Saturday! Hope this is good enough, Mom, because it's all I got:).

I just got home from the movie Juno. It is my favorite movie. Ever. Loved. It. Pulled on my heartstrings quite a bit though. When I first found out that I had endometriosis , I decided that by the age of 27 I would start trying to have a baby with or without a guy in my life. I turn 27 in less than 2 months and financially I am nowhere near ready to have a baby. But emotionally, I was ready years ago. The movie made my want for a baby even more evident. Jennifer Garner's character said something I loved, "Is there something you just knew you were born to do. ... I was born to be a mother." I was born to be a mother. Stupid movie, making me want a baby even more (if that's possible) and making me cry a lot. Oh, how I love you though.

Okay, well, my five year plan has taken on some changes. Bound to happen, I know. First off, without saying what company I work for, there are some possible big changes that may happen. And if it does, I may lose my pension. Which is my only reason of wanting to stick with the compay for the next 4 years. So if that happens, it will be time to find a new job. Which may be a good thing since I am liking mine less and less everyday. Still love the people, but everything else is lacking. Maybe if it happens it will be time to make a move, we will see what happens. I told one of the new women at work about my 5 year plan. A few weeks after telling her, there must have been some baby talk. As she was leaving that day, she said in passing, "Five year plan, right, more like one or two." I am wanting a baby more than ever. I think about it all the time. I swear every young woman at my company is pregnant right now. All of them. It is killing me. If I can get my finances in order, the...

Happy 2008! I think it will be a good year.

I emailed my sister today and she said I should post it to my blog. So here it is: "I went on a diet today... a sugar diet. I went CRAZY. Honestly, almost all I have had to eat today is sugar. Candy for breakfast, cookies for lunch, cookies for a snack. SOMEBODY STOP ME!!! I am shaky from all the sugar. I don't know what my deal is...well, I know what my deal is, but I need to stop. I did the math, I can only be sad for a week and a half according to Sex and the City. But I don't want to be sad that long, so by the time I come home, it will be done. All done. I am not sure there was much spark on my end either. I know that sounds like a hindsight comment. But even after the first kiss, I wasn't feeling all giddy like I should have. I chocked it up to my anxiety, but I don't think it was. I need to learn when my gut is telling me how I feel and when it is anxiety. I will have to talk to my counselor about that the next time."

I made the decision a couple months ago to put myself out there. I joined a free dating website. I started the conversations with guys I was interested in. I asked the guys out that I was getting along with. I went on 3 dates with one guy and talked to him almost everyday for a month. It was going great. I really liked him, he seemed to like me. I was happy. And he really did like me... as a friend. Here's the thing, he expressed interest in going out more than once, he kissed me. He told me that he was trying really hard to feel the spark because I was so nice and sweet and he wanted to feel it. He said that he really enjoys hanging out with me because we get along so well and he thinks we could be good friends. So cliche... except I really think he means it all. Every feeling pointed to him enjoying my company. And I think I will be friends with him because I get along with him so well. In time. I was pretty upset, crying a lot. I finally calmed down enough, so I told my parents....