Relief

It is done. I had a feeling when I emailed the mother this morning that she would email or call me about it later. When the phone rang, I thought "Please don't be L." And it was. We talked about the questions I had about school for S in a few weeks. Then she said, in a tone as if she already knew the answer, "Is that all you wanted to talk about?" I told her then that I made my decision for the next year and asked if she wanted me to tell her then on the phone or talk to both of them later. She said to tell her now, then we could discuss it more later. I told her I decided to go live with my sister. I told her that I felt like I was quitting a family, not a job. I told her that if I could work for them and live near my family, I would. She expected it. You could tell that she built up for this response. She said that they would love for me to stay, but that she completely understood, saying she is not sure she could be so far away from family (she is only 4.5 hours by train, 6 hours by car from her mom and sister). I felt all sorts of emotions when I hung up with her, mostly relief and sadness. I went to get the baby out of the crib and tears came to my eyes, I will miss her the most. But after calling my family and telling them, I also now feel excited. Excited to start a new job, move to a new place, live with my sister, be closer to friends and family, get a new car, decorate my own room. I am ready for this.